A better understanding of skin bleaching

I have talked about skin bleaching on a different post, Skin Bleaching, but I don't think I made some points, mentioned some things and elaborated on certain topics for someone who knows nothing about it to understand the controversy behind it.

Skin bleaching is not such a touchy subject among Blacks in America, Africans and Caribbean people but also Indian and Asian people.

Women are more likely to skin bleach than men. Because of societal pressure to always look your best, women are more likely to go to en extreme end with most beauty rituals such as skin bleaching as to get ahead or appear more beautiful to a wider range of people.

Skin bleaching products are not as publicized in American as they are in Africa, India and Asia. The most common ingredient  is hydroquinone and this has been proven to be cancer causing. To learn more about the hazardeours ingredients in skin bleaching creams as well as the short and long time effect of using bleaching read Skin Bleaching, Is It Worthy?.

With all the negativity that surrounds skin bleaching, why are women still doing it? The one number response has been "to feel more beautiful". Are they saying that darker toned women are less beautiful?

In western cultures, having fairer skin has been proven to provide the person more economic and social advantages. Fairer skin people have been considered easier to approach and appear "less dangerous". While in third world countries, fairer women have a better chance of getting married and making more money.

The video below is about the use of bleaching products in Nigeria and stories of those who have used it. There is also a part during the video where some men are asked which color of a woman they prefer and every one of them said they prefer darker women. Now that was very interesting.

Some women feel they are not necessarily bleaching their skin but making it more even and clear. Is there a difference between bleaching and lightening? Ultimately, the skin will go from one color to another. What about those face products that advertise about achieving "clearer and brighter skin"?

The debate between whether is is right or wrong to skin bleaching will forever be on going as long as there are skin bleaching creams, lotions, gels and medications out in the world.

I am a big believe in self-improvement as to become a better person, whether it is physical, spiritual  emotional or mental. I would never advise anyone to bleach their skin because of the cancer causing agents

Extreme Plastic Surgery of the Week

Meet Lacey Wildd, mother of three, and currently has the biggest breast implant. Now she doesn't hold the record for world's largest breast but she does want to get there. Because of her large breast, she has gained world wide attention and even models and does appearance as a personality.

                                                  

With large breast like these, I am sure there are a lot of downside. Lacey has complained about back pains and finding it difficult buying bras in her size. She has to have her bras and shirts custom-made and they can be very expensive. Lacey also states that her children are not very happy about her implants especially when they are around their friends.

Below is a short video of Lacey's daily life and her decision to increase her breast size.

It many seem to many that Lacey is overly consumed in her self image and disregards the well-being of those around her such as her children. Hopefully one day she realizes she is doing more harm that good to not only herself but her loved ones. 

Extreme Plastic Surgery of the Week

Take a good look at the picture to the left. Just about everyone can agree that this is a beautiful face.

But just because we all see her as beautiful, doesn't mean she may see herself as that. For anyone to feel the need to go under the knife to change a certain part of their physical feature only means that they do not find it appealing or attractive.

Lil Kim, like many celebrities, chose to go under the knife to change many different things. Some feel she went to an extreme and others find her look more appealing and mainstream for a wider range of audience.




Below are pictures of the dramatic change in her appearance. She has had her nose, breast, lips, and cheeks done. Not only that, she has bleached her skin to appear fairer.

                            

It is interesting because she has never openly stated as to what sparked the surgeries. Some people feel that after she was dumped by Notorious BIG for Faith Evans, she probably felt unattractive in comparison to Faith Evans. Does she consider herself more beautiful than before? Maybe one day we will know the truth.

It doesn't matter how much money you have, no amount of plastic surgery will ever fix the emotion problem.

61 yr old woman marries 8 yr old boy

We have all heard of sugar daddies and cougars,  where a person is in a relationship with another individual twice their age. We have even heard of stories where young women in their early twenties are with 70 year old men. Now is it fine for a 61 year old woman to be married to an 8 year old boy? A woman old enough to be his grandmother. My first reaction was; has this boy even been educated about life, experienced the course of youth to even acknowledge and understand what marriage really is.

The picture below on the left is Sanele Masilela and his bride Helen Shabangu. They don't look very happy on their wedding day.


So how did this commitment come to be? Sanele states that he was told by his dead grandfather to wed Helen. As to adhere to customs, an elaborate ceremony took place.

Helen states about Sanele's decision to married; "I know the story went out all over the world and it's great that other countries have been able to learn about our culture and our ancestors.What we did was not wrong. It's just our culture. When the ancestors ask something, we do what they say. I don't think other people understand that."

The picture below is the bride and groom sharing their first kiss.



Helen has been married before and currently has five children. Her husband, Alfred(65), is still alive and is happy about the marriage between Helen and Sanele.

Sanele has said that "the day was great and it was exactly what I had imagined it would be like. My friends thought it was really funny that I was getting married but I do now feel like a husband." Experienced words for a young boy. Sanele will still continue to attend school and plans to marry a girl of his own age one day in the distant future.

Many of us can read this story and be disgusted but with so many evil things happening in the world, this should not come as a shock. I am not in any way referring to their union as evil but I do feel that certain lines should not be crossed. But as long as the young boy is happy and healthy, I am not overly concerned.

Interview with Jane Doe

I did an interview with a family friend who wishes to remain anonymous to reasons that you will find out later in the interview. To keep a flow in the conversation, she will be referred to as Jane Doe.

A brief background of Jane Doe. She is of Nigerian decent, in her early thirties, successful in her line of work and is a lesbian.

Question: You live in American, where gay marriage is legal in 11 states, yet some of the closest people to    you do not even know your gay, why?

Jane Doe: I was actually born in Nigeria and I am very close to my family and culture that I find it difficult telling them the truth. I come from a country where no one openly admits their gay because the consequences by law leads to death. My family has openly vocalize that being gay is the same as being Satan's best friend and would even disown the person. So how can I feel comfortable saying that I am gay to them.

Question: Do you ever plan on telling them?

Jane Doe: If God gives me strength, yes. I am not mentally or emotionally prepared for the trauma that is to come after the news.

Question: Are you in a relationship?

Jane Doe: Yes and very happy

Question: How does she feel about you not telling your relatives about your true self?

Jane Doe: It is very difficult for her to understand because her family knows and accepts her for who she is. We went to school together and have been together for over 7 years. When I bring around my family, they assume and still thinks she is my best friend, which she is as well. She is also of a different race and background so I find myself not only explaining the mentality of the Nigerian people but also their lifestyle. It has proven to be very stressful to our relationship.

Question: So your more than of age to be married and have kids, have you been getting complaints?

Jane Doe: I am the last born out of 9 kids and the last born tend to get away with murder. Surprisingly, the push and pressure to be married is not as high for me. Now my eldest sister was practically forced to marry at 23.

Question: Do want kids?

Jane Doe: Yes, I do. I would love to adopt. My girlfriend wants to actually carry a child so it is something we are still debating about.

Question: Looking at you, I would never think you were a lesbian because you come off very feminine.

Jane Doe: (laughs) I laugh because in this day and age most people still picture lesbians as "wanna-be men" where we bandage our breast and cut our hair short. Although there are some who fit the physical description, being gay is a personal lifestyle and doesn't necessarily have to deal with your physical appearance.

Question: Do get hit on by men?

Jane Doe:  Yes I do and my reaction to both genders hitting on me is pretty much the same. I give the signature school girl smirk and eyelash batting.

Question: When did you realize that you were gay?

Jane Doe: I don't know when I knew exactly I was gay. I say that because society makes you believe that being gay is wrong and my family made it worse. But I came to terms with my sexuality at the age of 14, which is relatively young. Realizing this, I have never been in a relationship with a man.

Question: Do you get curious of what it may be like to be in a relationship with a man?
Jane Doe: Do you get curious on what it is like to be in a relationship with a girl?

I answered Jane Doe's question with a no and that is where the interview concluded. I definitely feel her pain as far as not feeling comfortable to talk to her family about her sexuality because it is even a struggle to get my own parents to understand that it is fine for people to date and marry outside of their race. 

Bulimia

This is based on a true story.

Teenage years came be the hardest is in a young adult's life. You go through peer pressure, trying to understand your changing body, and doing your best to make it through high school. I went to an all girls catholic school and to some it may sound like the worst experience ever but it was one of the best years of my life. I was very social so I was involve in pretty much everything. My friend who went to a coed public school had the complete opposite experience that I did. I am not here to compare and contrast catholic and public school but I do want to share a story of bad habits that can be formed due to influence from friends and surrounding environment.

My friend Nancy, who went to the public school, was so beautiful. Just about every boy you asked wanted her to be boyfriend. She was tall, fair and thin. She was an aspiring model and everyone felt she would make it big. I would walk to Nancy's school after I got out of mine and we would walk to my house together. Nancy would usually stay at my house till her mother came to pick her up after she got out of work. So you can imagine that we spent a lot of time together after school and we shared so many secrets. One day after school, I was complaining that I needed to lose a few pounds and asked Nancy if she would go on a diet with me. She agreed and really inspired me throughout the course of our short diet. I lost 5 lbs and Nancy lost 15 lb. For someone who was already thin, it really showed when she lost the 15 lbs. I didn't understand how she lost all that weight when we ate pretty much the same things but I just figured she had a much faster metabolism than I did. One day after school, Nancy started crying and couldn't stop crying while we were walking home. I kept asking her what was wrong and she found it difficult to say. After she calmed down, she confessed that she had been throwing up. My heart staying racing and I asked her if she was pregnant. She said no and she further explained that she purposely throws up after she finishes every meal. 

I felt like the cause of her bulimia, forcing her into a diet she didn't need for my selfish reasons. Nancy later explained that she doesn't feel beautiful as everyone makes her out to be and she has been insecure about her physical features. Nancy knew she needed help but she didn't know how to go about it. She made me promise not to tell anyone. Till this day, I have never said anything to anyone and I have always regretted it.

Nancy never made it to modeling. Nancy never made it out of high school. Her sickness got worse. She grew into an introvert and we grew apart. The last thing I heard about Nancy was that she moved to Nevada with her family. Whenever I think about her, I only hope that she is alive and doing well.

Unfortunately this is not a happy story. It is a story of warning. Do not do what I did. If you know anyone suffering from this type of disease, seek help for them. 

The Human Barbie Doll

Meet Valeria Lukyanova as known as the human barbie doll. At the young age of 23, you would ask what would prompt someone to make a living looking like a barbie doll. With all the strange people out in the world, dare I say that she is the most normal. 

Valeria has openly stated that she has had breast implant and "claims" that everything else is through makeup and special tricks. 

To many she is going to the extreme, but how is she different from any other woman that gets breast implants and apply a ton of makeup to feel more beautiful and look more flawless. 

Valeria has stated on different interviews that "many people say bad things about people who want to perfect themselves. It’s hard work, but they dismiss it as something done by surgeons or computer artists. Some people even spread rumors about me and retouch my pictures to hurt me. But I don’t take them seriously. I’m even flattered! It’s what success is like. I’m happy I seem unreal to them, it means I’m doing a good job."

This picture is just a glimpse of her amazing transformation that she claims is done through makeup.

The video is detailed pictures of her before and after; both facial and body transformation.

I did not grow up playing with a barbie doll but I can still see why women of all ages fantasize to be and look like her and some, such as Valeria, do anything possible to look just like her. Barbie was classified as the perfect image of a women with her long blond hair, long thin legs, full breast and lips and the slimmest waist. Maybe this is a call of action as to the type of doll character young girls should be playing with and that even is another topic for debate.